JEDDAH, Jul 2 (Arab news): Despite the so-called “opening up” of Saudi society, people still look at rape victims with suspicion, not showing any compassion for girls who have been living in severe agony and anguish after being violated.

A report published by Al-Watan Arabic daily has shed light on the pathetic condition of a number of rape victims who are forced to lead isolated lives. The report also carries the viewpoints of some young men, who divorced their wives after knowing about their “past life.” Who is to blame for this social problem — the rape victim, the rapist, or the attitude of society?

A young woman who was raped by her brother recounted her harrowing experience: “My brother agreed to the marriage proposal that came to me from one of his friends. But later, he objected to the marriage vehemently, apparently because of his fear that the rape incident would be made public. However, by that time the ties between my brother’s friend and me had been firmly rooted through our frequent communications.”

Her brother’s friend was determined to marry her and insisted on finding out the reason for the cancellation. Consequently, the young woman was forced to tell him what had happened. “I burst into tears while uncovering the secret, which I had not shared with any members of my family. He was dumbfounded when he heard my shocking revelations, and stopped calling me for several months. After that, he contacted me again and said he was ready to marry me after realizing that I was a victim,” she said.

Yet her hopes were dashed again when he told the story to his mother who was upset and strongly opposed the marriage. The girl is still hoping that the young man will come one day to accept her.

A young Saudi Muhammad told a story about his marriage with a cousin. “After two weeks of marriage, I discovered that she was not a virgin. I kept silence on the matter purely to protect her.” After coming to know that she had been in love with a man from her region, Muhammad still wanted to complete the marriage ceremony. The man had promised to marry her. “She believed him and spent time with him. But to her utter shock, he raped her and ended all contacts with her,” Muhammad said.

 “Even then, I protected her for a year, but she could not live with me. She still wanted to live with that man, which ultimately resulted in our divorce. She remains unmarried,” said Muhammad, who latter married another woman. “Because of this experience, I advise all young men not to marry a woman who had a previous affair with another man.”

According to Muhammad, rape cases vary from person to person. “The woman I accepted was raped in an unexpected assault. I would not have accepted her if she was one of those seductive women who lure young men with their charming dresses while walking around.”

Commenting over the issue, one Saudi housewife said that she would never allow her son to marry a rape victim.

Ummu Imad, another Saudi woman, said the raped woman is a victim who has committed no sin. “My son has committed no sin either, and he did not marry before. Therefore, a rape victim would not be suitable for him. Such women can be married by men who seek second wives, by divorced men or by widowers,” she says.

Commenting on the issue, prominent lawyer and legal consultant Rayyan Mufti said that rapists should be awarded either death sentence or lengthy jail terms. “We live in a society where young women are usually afraid to reveal the crime due to several reasons, including the damage it will cause to the family and fear of ignominy,” he said and stressed the need for rape victims to undergo medical tests to substantiate evidence against the rapist as well as to avoid complications in case of pregnancy and serious health problems.

Dr. Ali Al-Zayiri, a consultant psychiatrist, said that rape has a grave psychological impact on the victim. “It is disastrous in terms of both her mental and physical health,” he says, while noting that depression and suicide tendencies are common among such young women. He said family members can play a pivotal role in ensuring rehabilitation of victims. Highlighting the significance of support extended by the family and society to such women, he called for setting up women groups.

On his part, Dr. Ahmad Al-Qadi, educational and social consultant, called on the families to have a close vigil on their young women and make them avoid strangers